Tonight we listen to the top 10 girls. I can't believe Donut is still around. She is kicking things off, and I can't wait to see this. Oh honey, formal shorts and tights are not a good look for most women. She's singing What's Love Got To Do With It and I can't understand half of the lyrics, and it's all over the place, but she hits some crazy notes at the end. Keith likes her exhibitionism. Nicki is way harsh, Tai. All of the judges keep praising her spirit, as if we were at cheerleading camp and giving out an award for the best jazz hands. They all agree that the singing was kind of a mess.
Breanna is up next. I have no idea what this song is, and it's kind of boring. She has a nice voice and could probably do something more exciting. She's also pantomiming the lyrics, which I haaaaate. Keith likes it, Nick cracks the whip and says it wasn't up to her standard, and again I somehow think Nicki is the best judge this year. Mariah starts off giving some interesting critique and then derails into "but there are so many great girls!" territory. Meh, I probably won't remember her at 10:00.
Oh gawd, Aubrey was 8 years old when she watched Kelly Clarkson. I was starting my senior year of college. We are SO OLD. She's singing Big Girls Don't Cry. She sounds fine, I guess, but the song isn't all that challenging. The judges really liked it. Randy says she gives off a Rihanna vibe when she's in her tender moments, and Mariah says she has multi-platinum potential. I don't know, she was kind of boring. Maybe it's just the show I'm bored with.
Janelle is from a small town, have you heard? She's singing a country song that - surprise! - I don't know. I long for the days when I knew every song that was performed on this show. This is also boring... can someone do something exciting tonight, please? It's not even 9:00 and I'm ready for bed. Nicki says she is a little marshmallow that she wants to eat and calls her the best vocal of the night so far. I guess it was, but I wasn't blown away. Randy likes her old school country vibe.
Some crab legs mysteriously appear out of nowhere at the judges' table. Seriously, real crab legs. I have no idea what's going on.
Tenna is up next, and she's wearing a very short, tight dress. And it's another song I don't know. I'm sorry, readers, I don't care enough to google them or anything. At first I thought it was that song that Jordin killed in season 6, but apparently it's a Faith Hill song according to Keith. There is then some talk about boobs - for real - and then all chaos ensues, and I honestly have no clue what anyone thought about the actual performance.
Angie is up next, and she's still trying to top her Hollywood Week original song performance. She's at the piano, and again, I'm sorry, I don't know the song. What's up with kids these days? Anyway, she sounds really good, and the judges all love her. I just wish someone would sing a song I recognized. I think Angie interests me the most of any of the girls this year, so I hope she sticks around.
Ryan tells us before the break that the next girl will be singing Whitney, and I get this from Lindsay:
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The Whitney girl is Amber, and she's singing I Believe In You & Me. The judges give her a standing ovation, which I don't really think is deserved, because it's a Whitney song, and for the love of God, girls, STOP SINGING WHITNEY SONGS ON THIS SHOW. The judges don't agree with me, they're all raving about it, but I don't really hear any of it, because the Penguins posted a picture of Kris Letang in a tux on Facebook and I can't breathe anymore.
I've recovered for Kree's performance. I think I've heard this song, but I don't know it well, and so once again I'm bored. She's probably my favorite of the night so far though, and I like that she's normal and wearing jeans. Apparently she and Nicki are married, and they have an exchange that is really amusing and endearing, and the rest of the judges love her too. I think I can cheer for Kree. Even if her name is weird.
Yikes, Adriana looks like she's singing at a pageant. I don't know this song either, dammit. Lindsay says she liked her last week, but I'm not too impressed so far. This song sucks. Are these girls allergic to singing something up-tempo?!!? The judges basically all tell her she's not getting through. Randy agrees that it was boring and everyone needs to pick better songs.
Candice is in the pimp spot, and I can finally see the light at the end of this very long tunnel. Please sing something good, girl. Ugh, nope. It's slow and I don't know it either. She sounds fabulous though, and if America has any sense, she's sailing through to the next round. She actually leaves Nicki speechless, which THANK YOU CANDICE. Randy says she sang notes that people don't understand.
So those are our top 10 girls! I think Kree, Angie, and Candice need to stick around, and I want Donut for the entertainment factor. But aside from that, they're all interchangeable. Lindsay will guide you through the top 10 guys tomorrow. Till then!
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